I am writing this as I am struggling to go to sleep. Which has been a problem of mine for a while now. I have been fiddling with my phone, fighting the urge to text you or message you on Messenger. I know that we have not talked in ages. Like we used to. Oh, how I miss those times, it was like time does not even matter. And we wouldn’t tire and ran out of topic.
But that changed. Oh how that changed. Sometimes I blame myself, sometimes I blame you. I still blame you for every thing though. I just couldn’t say that to your face. You have been so friendly to me every since we met a good decade back. I don’t know why I was so drawn to you. I kept asking myself that. May be it was your wit, I can always have an intellectual conversation with you. Basically, we can talk about any thing and every thing.
I also think that it may be because of how you treat me. I always felt I had someone looking after me. If I had ate breakfast, how was my day, how was the family doing. You were always asking me how I have been. Funny enough, you ask more of these questions than my exes. Hilarious! And I don’t have to say how I am doing, because you can sense if I am okay or not. I feel like you can even read my mind without trying.
Lastly, I am so drawn to your amber eyes. I hate it. I hate how they look, and how you look at me. I hate how I can feel you read so much what is inside my head by just looking at me. I hate seeing my reflection with them honeycomb eyes.
Before I give in to Mr. Sandman’s spell, I will leave this for you to read. I will leave this for you to think about. Leave this for you to ponder. I will leave this just like you left. At least, I left this letter and a few words. And I will leave, you. Even though I miss so much of our conversation. And, I miss you.
I know you won’t miss me,